Please Sponsor Me, Lipstick Queen!!
When I first set out to write this post, I thought long and hard about my "angle." You see, I'd written about a red lipstick not more than 2 years ago for this blog. I'd have to be really daring if I wanted to pull this off again.
Then it struck me - and insanity plea! If it could work for serial killers with plenty of early childhood trauma and a possible brain scrambling head trauma, why couldn't it work for me, Anja, with little to no childhood trauma, and a very thick and impervious skull?!
Thus I bring to you my second post about Red Lipstick. I must be criminally insane!
Insane for this lipstick, that is (har har!).
The facts are these:* Lipstick Queen's Velvet Rope is the best red lipstick I have ever worn.
I continue to be impressed by the quality of Lipstick Queen's products, but Velvet Rope in the shade "Black Tie" ranks as my favorite red lipstick of all time, or for all you kids out there who use Snapchat, as my "best friend."
The color is a gorgeously deep but balanced blue red. It is quite creamy without sliding off the lips onto neighboring territories like the chin or philtrum ("snot chute" for you laypeople).
I think use of a lip liner is subjective based upon the shape of one's lips and how the mouth moves when speaking. I almost never use a lipliner, and don't find I need to with this lipstick as long as I make sure to blot it after application.
But I gave it a try anyway for Science, using Urban Decay's lip pencil in Bad Blood, and it did look even better - slightly fuller and more even around the edges, as one might expect. The effect made me as though I was lucky enough to have Pat McGrath do my makeup for a 2014 Dolce and Gabbana campaign (before Stefano Gabbana realized I was there and leveled many personal, highly damaging remarks at me regarding my face, body, and general audacity of existence).
I work as a waitress, and wearing a lipstick for a full shift is the ultimate test of a lipstick's abilities. Most become uncomfortable after 3 hours and start to look dry and shriveled on the lips. This is a hazard of the job, and does not necessarily mean that the lipsticks will fare quite as badly in the civilian world, but it certainly is an indicator.
This is the only red lipstick I have ever worn that remains comfortable and does not brutally dry out my lips through a 7 hour shift. I don't mean to say that it looks quite as fetching at the end of the day as it does in the beginning, but it wears fairly evenly, through multiple cups of coffee, and many, but not all kinds of food. It did not stand up to a dish of insanely spicy Thai mussels which blistered my lips like a red bell pepper upon a grill.
The bad news is that it retails for $50. Remember when we were talking about insanity?
Well geez!!! If you think that's so crazy, why are you reading a blog called "I Spent Too Much Money On This?" Get outta here!
I'm not going to tell you it's worth the money, because everything in the world is relative and I don't believe there is much intrinsic worth in any object, except maybe a bucket or some penicillin.
But it's a damn good lipstick.
*Do you recognize this line from the 2007 cult favorite Pushing Daisies? A show that upon rewatching I believe suffers from an unfortunate Johanna/Louise complex. Now that my brain is no longer full of the stars of teenage delusions, I favor the lusty Olive Snook, who wears her adorable mod mini zipped to exhibit maximum cleavage to our other heroine, dainty and incorporeal Johanna-like Chuck, who also displays a whole lot of cleavage because apparently, like our Gibson Girls of the other turn of the century, the 2000s bred women like modern roasting chickens - heavy in the breast.
 |
| Photo by Paige, Praise Her |
Thus I bring to you my second post about Red Lipstick. I must be criminally insane!
Insane for this lipstick, that is (har har!).
The facts are these:* Lipstick Queen's Velvet Rope is the best red lipstick I have ever worn.
I continue to be impressed by the quality of Lipstick Queen's products, but Velvet Rope in the shade "Black Tie" ranks as my favorite red lipstick of all time, or for all you kids out there who use Snapchat, as my "best friend."
The color is a gorgeously deep but balanced blue red. It is quite creamy without sliding off the lips onto neighboring territories like the chin or philtrum ("snot chute" for you laypeople).
 |
| Photo by Paige, Body by Vic Vinegar |
But I gave it a try anyway for Science, using Urban Decay's lip pencil in Bad Blood, and it did look even better - slightly fuller and more even around the edges, as one might expect. The effect made me as though I was lucky enough to have Pat McGrath do my makeup for a 2014 Dolce and Gabbana campaign (before Stefano Gabbana realized I was there and leveled many personal, highly damaging remarks at me regarding my face, body, and general audacity of existence).
I work as a waitress, and wearing a lipstick for a full shift is the ultimate test of a lipstick's abilities. Most become uncomfortable after 3 hours and start to look dry and shriveled on the lips. This is a hazard of the job, and does not necessarily mean that the lipsticks will fare quite as badly in the civilian world, but it certainly is an indicator.
This is the only red lipstick I have ever worn that remains comfortable and does not brutally dry out my lips through a 7 hour shift. I don't mean to say that it looks quite as fetching at the end of the day as it does in the beginning, but it wears fairly evenly, through multiple cups of coffee, and many, but not all kinds of food. It did not stand up to a dish of insanely spicy Thai mussels which blistered my lips like a red bell pepper upon a grill.
The bad news is that it retails for $50. Remember when we were talking about insanity?
 |
| Petition for rap song in which we replace word "swerve" with "swatch" |
I'm not going to tell you it's worth the money, because everything in the world is relative and I don't believe there is much intrinsic worth in any object, except maybe a bucket or some penicillin.
But it's a damn good lipstick.
*Do you recognize this line from the 2007 cult favorite Pushing Daisies? A show that upon rewatching I believe suffers from an unfortunate Johanna/Louise complex. Now that my brain is no longer full of the stars of teenage delusions, I favor the lusty Olive Snook, who wears her adorable mod mini zipped to exhibit maximum cleavage to our other heroine, dainty and incorporeal Johanna-like Chuck, who also displays a whole lot of cleavage because apparently, like our Gibson Girls of the other turn of the century, the 2000s bred women like modern roasting chickens - heavy in the breast.
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